Have you ever had that unexpected moment in your life when your entire outlook,attitude and perception about your purpose in life totally changed forever? A book or film or a person you met or a place you came across inevitably altered your vision in an uncontrollable manner and touched your spirit like no other experience in the past .
I've never believed in such larger than life ' mini miracles' until it happened to me one day, and a few times after that .Being a rational,pragmatic,overlogical person who always thinks and acts with my head rather than my heart,I ridicule 'experiences' that people talk about that moved them in astonishing ways and improved their life forever.So why have I turned into one of such 'believers' ?
It was my first winter in Scotland after I had just moved post my wedding.Martyn took me to watch a pantomime -my first - and what fun it was at Christmas time, and a week after all that X-mas chaos of buying gifts,decorating,adjusting to freezing temperatures,moaning about the killer windchill ,he took me to watch a classical film 'Its a wonderful life' .For a movie buff like me who appreciates commercial as well as serious cinema,I'd hardly heard of the storyline before,but the fact that the theatre was screening classic black and white films during winter appealed to me so I went along and came out a new person.
For anyone who has'nt watched it,please do.Its so touching how a simple script of a film's story can teach us our purpose in life by watching one man's example-in this case,the protagonist who is so close to giving up after having accomplished so much in life -just because he measures his contribution to society in terms of his professional accomplishment ,overlooking the numerous life-changing differences his living made in various other circumstances to all the people he interacted with in his life.Until he is reminded of what others' lives would have been like without his birth in this world.
Its totally altered my perception towards everything and everyone after that episode.Not that I underestimated anyone in particular or wished someone was never around,but like many of us,I did sometimes question the existence of doubtful people and uncontrollable situations that we end up experiencing on a daily basis.Why do we come across unpleasant , annoying co-workers or classmates who wind us up and why does everyone else besides me feel the same way about them too? Perhaps they've had a positive impact on others in their life,just like one of us !So let's grin and bear them !
Each and every individual has a unique, special and matchless quality in them that sets them apart from the rest and gives them a characteristic charm.The very fact that a person's birth has brought so much joy to people around is proof that the rest of his life will continue to benefit others by his mere existence .Sometimes its hard to realise how a person made a vital difference in another person's life by being part of it,even if he played his little role and left.
Most of us have hundreds of on-screen facebook friends and contacts on our mobile phone,but ask them to name a few who have really touched their lives and certainly,a handful of names will crop up .I'd like to mention a few of my longterm friends and family members who are and will continue to be my backbone in life, and also two prior ' acquaintances' who at first meeting seemed unimportant,but have moved me forever - Ava and Katja-they are one of my best friends now despite the long physical distance between us.
First and foremost my wonderful parents without whom I would'nt come,survive or thrive in this world.They have loved me unconditionally despite me being an obstinate,fussy,quirky,geeky ,ambitious cum bohemian rebel.My big brother Imtiaz who is a total true genuine gem of a person,so content,so simple,so nice that anyone who meets him always remembers him forever for his intrinsic good nature.My little sister Nazia who 's insatiable positive spirit for enjoying life gives me my vivacious bubbly character,my schooltime buddy and best friend Tasneem who is a total powerhouse dynamo - a serene,enthusiastic,totally family oriented,diligent,talented mother who sincerely cares about each and everyone in her world,my college time friend Manasi who is an exceptional girlfriend - beauty,brains,ambition,passion for life,hard work,all rolled into one ,with a thirst for knowledge and travel,more than anyone else I know.My friend Pallavi who is special because I met her when most of my friends had migrated abroad after marriage and she's class personified and unlike my other friends,she taught me the importance of good quality stuff and appreciating the finer things in life as she's so well read and well travelled.Not only that - she's such a sweet destiny's child - happy to be unplanned and discover the joys of life as they come along !
I met Ava by chance as she's my friend Seema's sister -in-law who came as a subsitute for canteen duty in the International French school where I was a teacher .At first she seemed like a pretty lady,very charismatic.Over the months I got to know her as a friend,co-worker and buddy whom I could open upto and she's such a balanced person-I wish I had that mental stability and down to earth charm she has despite her privileged background,family,cute children-meeting her made me realise anyone could have it all and still maintain innocence and stability in life .
Katja is another person who at first seemed like we may not be more than colleagues -but she's absolutely the most energetic person I know-ever !She has an insatiable hunger for discovering beautiful,historical places ,good food,fashion and has such a positive aura and vibe around her with her fresh looks and smile,at first I'd wonder how can one not grumble or gossip -but she really is always such a fun-loving optimist and has shown me so many beautiful medieval significant places that the town and whole world seems like a better place to live in .Right from the 'Ladies Come Lunch with me' club we formed,to the Necropolis of Glasgow,the vintage restaurants and authentic german baking lessons,its been nothing but joyous vibes from her 24/7 .
After these special people who have changed my life ,there is a special place I visited that changed me too-so unexpectedly-The tenement house.For those of you who don't know what a tenement is-its a typical tiny flat built in blocks in industrial cities like Glasgow,where workers' families would stay within their means in cramped cold conditions.For me it was just another monument visit at first,but once I saw the actual tenement and realised what hard,cold ,dark conditions a huge family would live in happily camped around the kitchen stove to remain warm, and that heating would be put on only if an elderly family member was really sick,it got me thinking how priveleged and spoilt we have been growing up in warm and sunny India.
These moments,people and places have changed me forever and made me less of a cynical ,bitter person,yet I'm waiting for the next one and I am sure it will be a total surprise again !
